A Week With Poppa

  My Dad arrived in Zambia last Saturday. It was awesome to see the instant connection that he had with Isaac. I think all those Skype conversations really helped to create a bond between them. Isaac is usually reluctant to be held by strangers, but he seemed to know his Poppa right from the get go. Since then they have been like two peas in a pod.

Isaac and Poppa at Sugarbush

My Dad has been focusing on pictures of animals with a "p" sound in hopes that Isaac's first word will be Poppa. So there's a lot of "p...p...p...panda" and "p..p...p...penguin".

Checking out Isaac's favorite banana tree after a swim.

  This week we went to the elephant orphanage at Lilayi Game Reserve on the outskirts of Lusaka. This project is in collaboration with Kafue National Park. There are 6 baby elephants at Lilayi and 7 at Kafue National Park. I was impressed by all the efforts they are making to raise these baby elephants and release them back into the wild. A large component of the program involves community engagement and education as poaching is a significant problem in Kafue National Park. Since the education programs with school children and engagement of the local village, instead of killing elephants that wander into the village, the people there now telephone the rangers when they see a baby elephant that might need help. After we were educated about the project, we were told to get our cameras ready as we would have approximately 8 seconds to see the elephants drink their bottles – the time it takes for them to down 2 liters of formula. It’s clear that Isaac isn’t the only one that guzzles his bottles. We got to observe everything from an elevated platform. The caretakers were all ready with the bottles and then the elephants were let into the enclosure. There was a lot of trumpeting and a stampede of baby (still looked pretty big to me) elephants as they ran to get their bottles. Isaac got scared and started crying, but he eventually calmed down once he realized that there was nothing to be scared of. After watching the elephants have their meal of formula and leaves, we went to have our own meal at the lodge. It was a very nice outing and something that I’ve been wanting to do for awhile. I’m glad that I got to have this experience before I left Zambia. Orphans are obviously close to my heart. Everyone deserves to have someone to love them and it’s clear that the caretakers at Lilayi love their baby elephants. 

Waiting for the elephants to arrive.

The stampede.

The smallest one is only 9 months old. Same age as Isaac.

An elephant kiss.

There were lots of leaves to go around, but somehow that branch had the best leaves.

So nice to be able to hang out with my Dad again.

The Eleventh Hour

  It was down to the eleventh hour. As of Wednesday evening we were still waiting to hear when our court date would be. We had heard that our papers had made it to the Magistrate and that he was reviewing them, but unfortunately, no date had been set. My father was due to fly out on Thursday to Zambia and Markus was scheduled to fly home on Saturday. We worried that flights would need to be cancelled and rescheduled. Markus was worrying about work and I was wondering if our court date was ever going to happen. I also had this petrifying fear that Isaac could still be taken away from us. Until those papers are signed, nothing is a done deal, nothing is certain. With the missing police report, I worried endlessly that the legitimacy of the adoption would be called into question despite being assured repeatedly that an investigation had in fact been completed. We had been promised that we could meet with the lawyer that our adoption fees had paid for, but again we were disappointed and our contact here was no longer pursuing a meeting with the lawyer for fear that he was “pressuring” our social worker too much. What about our pressure and fears, I wanted to scream. I felt ill with worry, stress, and frustration.

  The next morning, January 16^th, will forever be in my mind as we received the best news of our lives. Felix stopped by our place to let us know that our papers had been signed!!! We didn’t even need to go to court! I couldn’t believe it and immediately burst into tears. I think my emotion has been concerning, frustrating, and very strange to Felix, but there was no controlling the absolute relief I felt at that moment. It was as though all the months of stress were literally pouring out of me. When Isaac woke up from his nap a few minutes later, it was amazing to pick him up and know that he was officially my son. He’s been my son since the moment I first laid eyes on his photo all those months ago in my office at work, but to make it official, was something special. Once Felix left, after giving us detailed instructions on the next steps (birth certificate and passport), Markus, Isaac, and I had a family hug and then a little dance party. I think Isaac could see our happiness and although he may not understand the reason, he was all smiles as well.

Our first "official" family photo after a celebratory nap.

Four Month Update

  I’ve been in Zambia for four months now and I’m so close to coming home I can almost taste it - the coffees at Continental Cafe, dinners in North Van, my mom’s cookies, sushi, fresh fish from the fishmonger on the Drive, pizza from via Tevere, my mother-in-law’s tiramisu. I’m so close that I can almost smell it – the salty air down by Spanish Banks, the damp, musty smell of the forest at Lynn Valley Headwaters, the fresh, crisp smell of the mountain air at Whistler. I’m so close that I can almost feel it – the heat of the wood burning fire at my parent’s place, being bundled up against the cold morning air on my walks with Gibson, resting my head on my pillow and falling asleep in my bed, cuddling on the couch with my husband. I’m so close that I can almost see it – the morning light streaming through my kitchen windows, the ice covering Trout Lake, the beautiful tree-lined streets of my neighbourhood. My senses are calling out to Vancouver and I can’t wait to renew my love affair with my home town and share as much as I can with Isaac.

  It feels like this month has been a month of movement for Isaac. He literally hasn’t stopped moving since he started crawling a few days after my three month update post. Aside from sleeping and periods of time in which he is forced to be still such as in the car seat or carrier, Isaac is always on the go. I get a real kick out of watching him crawl. When he really wants to go fast, he puts his head down and just goes for it. He’s such a determined little man. I’m just waiting for the cries when he ends up running into a wall or hard piece of furniture. Last week, he started pulling himself up into a standing position and has also started taking a few steps while holding onto furniture. One of Isaac’s favorite things to do now is to stand holding onto the bars, either looking out to the front or back of the house. This often involves some sort of screaming (in excitement) or head banging movement (also in excitement). His babbling has progressed and he’s become quite the talkative guy. I think his favorite means of communication are still the raspberry or scream, but there are a lot more sounds coming from his mouth now. He even has “ma” down pat and I’m just waiting for the day when I hear a clear “Mama”. I’ve come to realize that even though the majority of babies get to go through these developmental stages, when it’s your child, it’s absolutely magical. 

 

  Isaac and Markus have officially bonded. They are definitely two peas in a pod which brings so much happiness to my heart. Favorite activities together include: rides in the carrier in which Isaac tries his best to bite the buttons off Markus’s shirt, shoulder rides, wrestling on the floor, reading books, building towers of books for Isaac to knock down, and in rare moments, sitting quietly outside on the patio. Markus has discovered a cure-all for Isaac’s cries. If Isaac is fussy or bonks his head as tends to happen now that he’s on the move, Markus quickly gets the “Snuggle Puppy” book. The words in this book are meant to be sung and Isaac just loves it.

Just to clarify, this is Isaac's excited face.

Captain Distructo

  The other day we went for afternoon coffees at one of the shopping centers. We came across a Zambian drummer and dance group. Isaac was absolutely enthralled with the music. He seems to have a wide range of musical interests from Zambian drummers, to Mumford and Sons, to Raffi, to Gorillaz, to the Lumineers. He especially likes it when we dance around with him and swing him up in the air. 

  Isaac and I have started going on runs with the stroller. I realize that this looks incredibly strange in Zambia and get a lot of looks when I’m out, but I just don’t care. It’s been great to run again and to do an activity that I had been looking so forward to doing with Isaac. At first, I wasn’t sure if Isaac liked being in the stroller, but now that he’s used to it, I think he really enjoys the view. He gets an unimpeded view forward which compared to the carrier and car seat, is something new for him. Like his mother, he seems to have difficulty staying awake in moving vehicles. Runs end with him fast asleep in the stroller. I can only imagine future road trips as a family - Markus driving with Isaac and me snoring soundly. Apologies in advance, Markus.

Whew, jogging is tiring. I think I'll just close my eyes for a bit.

  When I think back on the past four months, there have been new roles that I’ve had to take on. The most obvious being a new mom. But there have been others. When my mom was here, I got to be her hairdresser (I think she’s probably happy to be in the hands of a professional now) and her surgeon (unfortunately, had to remove one of the fly larvae from the back of her leg – cuticle scissors and alcohol wipes came in handy). Both of these were a bit of a “Tschopp” job (get it “chop” job – sorry, couldn’t help myself). In the time that I was experimenting with scissors (sorry Mom), Markus was honing his skills in the kitchen. He’s now become quite the gourmet chef and I have been enjoying all the meals that he has made since he’s been here. There have been a lot of power outages lately which has made getting dinner on the table a bit dicey, but also mean that there’s a really good reason to eat by candle light. How romantic!

My men in the kitchen.

  The three weeks that Markus has been here have just flown by. Actually, it was a bit shocking to already be writing this four-month update. Markus is scheduled to fly home on Saturday which I’m just dreading. It’s been absolutely amazing to be together as a family. Unfortunately, we’re still waiting for our court date. Last week we found out that our case had been taken to the Head Office and is now being “fast tracked” due to the delays we have experienced. I guess even by Zambian standards, the delay is getting a bit extreme. We’re still waiting to hear when we will get to go to court. It’s the case of another “any day now” situation, but it’s getting a bit stressful as “any day” really needs to happen in the next three days or Markus will need to reschedule his flight. We’re also preparing for my dad to come. He’s planned to arrive on Saturday as well, but again, his flight is up in the air if we don’t hear soon about this ___ (insert bad word here) court date. My dad will be helping Isaac and I on the final leg of our journey as we head to South Africa for the visa home.

  Before I left, my sister gave me four cards, one for each month that I would be in Zambia. I just opened my four-month card today. Yesterday, we were joking around on Skype. I said that as she didn’t make me a five month card, I really need to be home before February 14^th. She heartily agreed and said that staying past five months just isn’t an option. It’s nice to start thinking about my time here in terms of weeks instead of months.

We'll be sad to say goodbye to the pool, but I'm ready for colder climates. Are you, Isaac?

 

First Family Road Trip

  We just got back from our first road trip as a family to the Kafue National Park. It’s about a 3 hour drive from Lusaka along a very straight road directly west. The drive was nostalgic for me as we listened to and sang along with Paul Simon’s Graceland which brought me back to Albright family road trips as a child. The farther we got from Lusaka the farther away the stress of court dates and police reports seemed. For me, it was a much needed break from worrying. For Markus, it was his first safari experience and he was not disappointed. Here is one of the conversations from our drive into the park:

Erin: Honey, what’s that big lump on the road up ahead?

Markus: I don’t know.

Erin: Oh, my God! It’s a huge lion.

Markus: What should I do?

Erin: Just wait, he’ll move eventually.

Hello, Mr. Lion. Thanks for sharing the road with us.

  The lion did eventually move after taking his time stretching and slowly meandering off the road. We also came across a herd of elephants as we drove towards the lodge. The scenery was absolutely breath taking. It’s the rainy season here so everything is very green and lush looking. The plains are a blanket of long grasses, the trees are green with leaves, and the rivers are full. A very different view than what my mom and I experienced when we were in the South Luangwa Park in October at the end of the dry season. The Kafue park is huge. It’s the size of Belgium and home to an amazing number of species.

I just want to break out into Lion King songs when I look at this photo.

 When we checked into the Mukambi Safari Lodge, we had a similar safety warning to the one they give at Flatdogs – watch out for hippos, lions, elephants, etc. After our encounter with the lion and elephants on the way in, you didn’t have to tell us twice to watch out. Our amazing tent (very loose definition of a tent in my opinion) was very romantic, although, some of the romance was lost with the 9-month old traveling with us. Although I’m getting really tired of mosquito nets, the way they had them hung looked like a gauzy canopy over the bed. There was also a bath on the deck which overlooked the river. Absolutely beautiful. We were sad that we missed seeing the lodge’s resident hippo, Basil. Apparently, in the winter months, he comes up from the river and lies in the lobby during the day and then goes back to the water at night. The staff set up a fence around him during the day so that he can be safely observed. Another one of those, “only in Africa” experiences that I’m sorry we missed.

Our "tent".

Isaac and I enjoying the view from the bath.

  As I did with my mom at Flatdogs, Markus and I switched off on the activities so that one of us could stay back with Isaac. Although we did get to do a family sunset boat trip together along the Kafue river. If the boat trip had ended after the planned 1.5-2 hours, we would have been laughing. It’s good that Isaac quickly endeared himself to the other couples on the boat as he wasn’t a happy camper for the last half hour of the ride back to the lodge. Lesson learned – Isaac will not fall asleep anywhere but his bed at night. 

My men.

  Markus had some fantastic experiences on his safari drives. He also got to go fishing with a guide which was an experience to remember. Not often do you get to fish along side hippos and crocs. At the lodge, Isaac and Markus had a run in with some warthogs who live under the lodge. They were sitting on a swing by the river and the mama warthog and her three babies ran out from under lodge only to be confronted by Isaac and Markus on the swing. There was a tense one minute stare down in which Markus wasn’t sure what was going to happen before the warthogs high-tailed it out of there. They literally run away with their tails in the air – it’s quite funny.

The look on this guy's face says, "Don't mess with me", but it's a little difficult to take him seriously with a cute bird on his back.

  I had some interesting safari experiences as well. I got to observe two crested cranes mating. This involved a lot of wing flapping and bobbing up and down. At first, the guide thought that the male had rejected the female. Then he noted that the male was making a call to the female to indicate that there was some food where he was at. The female came over and the male jumped her. Apparently, there are expectations that come with dinner even in the animal world. The second really memorable experience came on our night drive. We were driving through a field and our vehicle got stuck in the mud. With everyone pushing and after several failed attempts, we were finally able to push the car free. There were jokes all around – where were the elephants and water buffalos when you needed them to help push, glad the lions didn’t show up at that moment – we would have been easy pickings. With everyone covered in mud, it was a real bonding experience under the African night sky.

Cranes putting the moves on.

How do you like my bobbing?

Puku and water bucks

Kudu

Under African skies

  On the drive back to Lusaka, I was dreading the return to the frustration and stress of arranging our final court date. Sometimes songs come on at the perfect moment. We were listening to one of Isaac’s children’s albums when a cover of Bob Marley’s Three Little Birds started playing. It was a perfect message in that moment:

Rise up this mornin',
Smile with the risin' sun,
Three little birds
Each by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true,
Sayin', "This is my message to you-ou-ou: "
Singin': "Don't worry 'bout a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right."
Singin': "Don't worry (don't worry) 'bout a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right! "

                                                                                                Bob Marley

In my heart of hearts, I know that everything will work out okay. I just have to be patient as we make our way towards the home stretch.

Chillin' after a swim.

Tschopp family selfie

Highs and Lows

  This week has been a week of highs and lows. It’s been absolutely amazing having Markus here. Watching him bond with Isaac has been incredible. The two of them have so much fun together. I’ve been enjoying sharing our daily routine with Markus and also having help at night. We’ve resumed sleep training and already we’re seeing improvements. The other night I was able to sleep from 9:30pm-4:30am (Markus woke up with Isaac a couple of times and I didn’t even hear him). I felt great the next day. Isaac has been sleeping a lot better as well and not waking up so much which has made us all happier and feeling much more rested. 

First shoulder ride.

Bubbles are so much fun.

  Isaac has become a crawling machine and it’s been wonderful (and scary at times) to watch him explore his world with his new found freedom. It seems like babies have an intrinsic sense of all the dangerous places in the house and make a bee-line straight for whatever they determine to be off-limits. For example, the heavy metal bars on our doors are great for swinging back and forth. I’m scared he’s going to hit himself in the face so now the bars are secured when he’s awake. All power cords, the sharp bolts that the bars are attached to, the garbage can, and power outlets have all become extremely interesting and something that Isaac feels he needs to lick, bite, or touch. Yesterday, he pulled himself up to standing for the first time. That he felt the need to do this in the slippery bath is just par for the course with his danger seeking behaviour. I’m trying to manage my fear of head injuries with the desire to not smother him with too much worry, but in some cases, I feel like a helmet could be really useful. 

Isaac trying to climb out of the bath.

  Markus has been taking Isaac in the carrier for our walks which I really feel has helped with their bonding and also with my back pain. At last weigh in he was 22 pounds but this was a month ago and I can only imagine that he’s at least a couple pounds heavier now. Our little man is not so little and my back has been feeling it, so it’s been great to share the load with Markus. We’ve also been testing out our stroller and Isaac seems to like it, but I miss seeing his face when he’s in the carrier. 

Enjoying our morning walk.

  On Monday, we all went to visit my favorite people at Immigration (note the sarcasm). I was shocked and pleasantly surprised that my three-month visiting permit had actually been processed! It made dealing with the rude and unfriendly behaviour so much easier. On the very positive side, I never have to go back to Immigration (unless for some reason I’m still in the country by March 16^th). This felt like something to celebrate for sure.

  Finally, today, January 3^rd, is the final day of our three month fostering period with Isaac and his 9-month birthday! In some ways, I cannot believe how time has flown by. In other ways, it’s felt like a very long time and I’m more than ready to come home. More than anything, we are ready to give up the label of foster parents and become Isaac’s official adoptive parents.  

I'm 9-months old today!

Sophie celebrating with a beer. Isaac's concerned - he didn't think she was legal.

I'm so happy to be back together with my wonderful husband.

  Which leads me to the lows of this week, we still have no word on when our court date is. We’re also still waiting to hear about this missing police report and have heard that the police officer responsible for the report is now working in a different district. I’ve been trying for the past three weeks to make contact with our social workers to find out what the plan is for getting this report. I finally spoke with her yesterday only to be told that I should be patient, let them do their job, and if I push, it will be difficult for me. First of all I didn’t appreciate the not so veiled threat that if I continue to call them, they basically won’t do their job for Isaac and my family. Secondly, I feel like I’ve been more than patient and we were promised our court date a month and a half ago. Thirdly, if I don’t “encourage” them into action, it feels like nothing happens. So, yeah, this was a low for me. To top off the lows for the week, I found a large cockroach crawling in the sheets just after I had gotten out of our bed and was making it. Yuck!  

An unwelcome bed-mate. Super scary, especially when you have a bug phobia.

  When we started this adoption process, there were two songs that when I first heard them on the radio made me cry. The first one was “I Will Wait” by Mumford and Sons. While I’m sure they didn’t mean for it to be an adoption song, some of the lyrics really spoke to what Markus and I had been going through. This song has become my anthem through this long and difficult process.

And I’ll kneel down

Wait for now

And I’ll kneel down

Know my ground

And I will wait, I will wait for you

And I will wait, I will wait for you

…

So I’ll be bold

As well as strong

And use my head along side my heart

…

Cause I will wait, I will wait for you…

                        I Will Wait

                                    Mumford and Sons

Yesterday we were listening to this album (Isaac really likes Mumford and Sons). This song came on and I looked at my son. After having such a low day, I realized yet again that our trials and tribulations are all worth it. He’s more than worth it.

  The second song that made me cry is “Home” by Phillips Phillips. I can’t wait until this is my new anthem and the waiting is over.

Hold on, to me as we go

As we roll down this unfamiliar road

And although this wave is stringing us along

Just know you’re not alone

Cause I’m gonna make this place your home

Settle down, it’ll all be clear

Don’t pay no mind to the demons

They fill you with fear

The trouble it might drag you down

If you get lost, you can always be found

Just know you’re not alone

Cause I’m gonna make this place your home…

                                    Home

                                                Phillip Phillips

I’m looking so forward to finally making Vancouver Isaac’s home.

Happiness is.... Isaac's smile.