Two Month Update

  Well, I’ve been in Zambia for two months now. In a way, it feels as though time has flown by, but at the same time it feels like I’ve been away from family and friends for a very long time. I have days when homesickness just hits me and there’s not much I can do to get over it. By the next day, I’ll be feeling better and determined to make the most of my time here.

  Isaac has been wonderful. He’s growing so much. In the past month, he’s gained 4cm in length and is now 20.5 pounds. My mom and I are sure feeling his growth in our tired arms and backs. He’s now between the 50^th-90^th percentile ranges for the various measurements. I am continually thankful for the care and good nutrition that he received at the House of Moses. Without their care, I’m not sure how he would be doing now. We went for a visit at the orphanage last week. Everyone was so happy to see him and to see how much he had grown. They also loved seeing a video of him swimming. I think it’s quite a novelty to see a Zambian swimming – there’s so many things that can kill you in the lakes and rivers here that many don’t know how to swim. Isaac was very excited to see the other babies, in particular, Jacob, the little boy that had his crib next to him. It brought a tear to my eye to see them holding hands and Isaac talking away to Jacob.

  Isaac has become fearless in the pool. He lets me fully dunk him and constantly wants to put his face in the water. I’m fearful that he’s going to get a parasite from all the water he drinks when I’m not paying attention. I’ve been sitting him on the edge of the pool deck and he leans forward and kicks his little legs to launch himself off the edge. I’m holding onto him the whole time, but I’m amazed at how brave he is. If he’s having a bad day, all we need to do is put him in the pool or the bath for him to feel better. The pool has saved us many a day.

Isaac and his hippo in the bath.

Isaac relaxing after a swim. All that kicking is tough work.

  Isaac has fallen in love with having his picture taken. He gets super excited every time he sees my iPhone or the camera. He squeals and waves his arms. He’s such a clown sometimes.

  We’ve been to a baby class a couple of times now. Isaac loves the songs and bubbles. I like that I get to see other moms. It’s made me feel better to notice that they are all yawning away just like me.

  I’m not sure if you remember me mentioning the large spider living in my bathroom from one of my earlier posts. I had named the spider, Bruce, but it appears that Bruce may have actually been a Brenda. There’s been a hatching of baby spiders that are all over the bathroom. Also, Brenda appears to be no more. It’s literally Charlotte’s Web being played out in my bathroom, without the farm animals, of course. I’m really hoping these baby spiders make their way outside. There are only so many huge spiders I can tolerate in my bathroom.

  My mom and I are loving all the lizards around our house. There have been a lot of baby lizards lately that make their way inside the house. Sometimes I find one sitting on my laptop while I email. I think they like the heat from the computer. The other day we found a particularly small one on our laundry basket. We named it Lizzy (original, I know). Because we were worried that it might end up in the wash, I moved the lizard to my bathroom. I’m hoping little Lizzy will help take care of my spider problem.

Lizzy the lizard

  We’ve had the good fortune to hire a maid three days a week. Her name is Beatrice and we share her time with one of our neighbours. It’s been amazing having the help around the house. It allows my mom and me to focus more on Isaac and on having some breaks during the day. This has been so important lately now that Isaac has decided that he really doesn’t want to nap for more than 45 minutes at a time. It’s difficult to get anything done in such a short period of time when you are trying your best to not make any noise. My mom and I have been so happy to give up all the ironing to Beatrice. She does a much better job than we do. All our clothes are completely wrinkle free and meticulously folded, even our underwear.

  I feel like we’ve slowly been developing a bit of a rhythm to life here in Lusaka. We’ve learned where to go for groceries – each store has slightly different things available, so you have to plan your trip to make sure that you can get what you need. We’ve found a couple good places to get coffee – very important to Vancouverites with our coffee addictions. Our day is scheduled by Isaac’s naps, but usually consists of a walk early in the morning (we’re often out the door before 7am), an outing mid morning, a swim late afternoon, Skype conversations, an evening walk down our block, and then the bedtime routine. I’ve found that it’s important to keep things moving through the bedtime routine or the “7 B’s” as I like to call it – bath, brush teeth, bottle, books, ballads (I think Isaac is the only one who can tolerate my horrible singing), bunny, and bed. You have to keep things moving or else Isaac just deteriorates into a fussy mess as I’ve found out the hard way. While it’s nice to have a routine, some days I feel like we are getting a bit of cabin fever. Lusaka is described in the guide books as a place that you fly into and then quickly out of again. It’s a busy city, but there seems to be limited things to do here with a baby. There are no parks, community centers, or libraries that we are aware of. Things that you imagine yourself doing with a baby just don’t seem to exist here. Heat is also a limiting factor. The afternoon sun is very hot and I just don’t feel comfortable taking Isaac out in the heat. With him in the baby carrier, we generate a lot of heat together and end up a sweaty mess. I just don’t think it’s healthy for either of us. My mom and I have realized that it’s important for our sanity to get out of Lusaka every few days. There are two cafes that we have been going to on the outskirts of the city that give us the feeling like we are out of the city. We’ve also been making plans to venture a bit further and explore some of the small game parks and farms outside of Lusaka. We’ve also booked a trip to Livingstone and Victoria Falls for the beginning of December.

  We’ve met a couple of our neighbours in the complex that we live in. The pool has been a great meeting place. It would have been difficult to meet anyone without the pool because even though our place is surrounded by a huge wall, each individual house in the complex has a wall and gate. It feels very closed off. At the pool, we’ve met one family with two small boys. The husband is Norwegian and the wife is American. We’ve also met another woman, Isabel, who works for the French Embassy. Isaac really likes seeing the two boys, Lukas and Alex, at the pool. I think he really misses being surrounded by children.

  We’ve had the opportunity to entertain a couple of times since being here. We had our social workers over a couple weeks ago. Isaac is now in a stage where he does not like to be held by anyone other than me or my mom. I hear that separation anxiety and stranger danger develop at this age. Although it was too bad that the social workers were unable to hold Isaac without him crying, I think it was a great way to demonstrate his attachment to me as he stopped crying the minute he was returned to my arms. The lunch was a success – both of our social workers asked for the recipe for the couscous salad that we made. They were very interested to know what was in it and had never had couscous before. We also had Isabel over for dinner last week. It was so interesting to hear about her life working for the French Embassy and the different places that she has lived. 

Our table. I bought the table cloth at the market in Kitwe.

  Although I left behind Burnaby Hospital when I got on that plane, my skills as a Speech-Language Pathologist have come to use here. The nurse at the orphanage has a friend who had a stroke in May. She was able to receive physiotherapy after her stroke, but unfortunately, there are no Speech-Language Pathologists here. I did an assessment with her last week. It kills me that she has not received any therapy as her speech and language ability is quite impaired. Although, I’m across the world in a different culture, I was struck by the similarity of what individuals go through after suffering a stroke and being faced with chronic aphasia. In Canada, adjusting to a life with aphasia is incredibly difficult at any age, but particularly for younger individuals. There are limited supportive services available and often individuals with aphasia end up isolated from community.  Here, the situation seems to be even bleaker. I’ll be doing some pro bono work with my new client weekly while I’m here. Hopefully we can make some gains and I can set up a program for her when I leave. I’m used to working with interpreters at Burnaby Hospital, but I think this will likely be the first and last time, I’ll need an interpreter for Tonga and Nyanja.

A proud Nana.

  Overall, I’m proud of all the progress we’ve made during the two months I’ve been here. Isaac is happy and well adjusted and we’re settling into life here. My mom has been an amazing support and I feel lucky that Isaac gets to spend so much time with his Nana. We’ve been able to explore the country a little bit and have plans to do more traveling coming up. I’m almost halfway done my stay in Zambia. I have days when this feels more like a glass is half empty situation and the time ahead of me seems long filled with frustrations of having to navigate the adoption bureaucracy. Other times, I can see that the glass is half full. I’m getting to spend amazing time with my son in his country, experiencing a new culture and way of life.

Love